幽默英文小笑話
笑話作為一種城市化的民間口頭創(chuàng)作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。在俄羅斯文化中,笑話一直都具有無(wú)法替代的特殊意義。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來(lái)的幽默英文小笑話，歡迎閱讀!
幽默英文小笑話篇一
Problem with Gas放屁的問(wèn)題
A little old lady goes to the doctor ... and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't really bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent.
有位小老太太去看醫(yī)生：“醫(yī)生，我有愛放屁的毛病。其實(shí)也不是大問(wèn)題，只是我放屁不臭而且沒聲音。
As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent."
事實(shí)上，我在這里已經(jīng)放了20多個(gè)屁，但是你并不知道對(duì)吧，因?yàn)槲业钠ú怀?，而且還沒聲音。”
The doctor says, "I see. Here's a prescription. Take these pills 3 times a day for seven days and come back to see me next week."
醫(yī)生說(shuō)：“好的，我明白了。吃這個(gè)藥片，一天三次連續(xù)吃七天，下星期你再來(lái)。”
The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts ... although still silent... stink terribly."
一星期后老太太來(lái)了，“醫(yī)生，你到底給的我什么藥，現(xiàn)在我放屁還是沒聲音，但是怎么這么臭!”
The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's start working on your hearing."
醫(yī)生說(shuō)：“太好了!你的嗅覺正常了，現(xiàn)在開始治聽覺。”
幽默英文小笑話篇二
Psychiatrist 精神病醫(yī)生
Jerry went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble.
杰瑞去看精神病醫(yī)生。“醫(yī)生，我有些不對(duì)勁。
Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I'm going crazy!" Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears." How much do you charge?" A hundred dollars per visit." I'll sleep on it," said Jerry.
每次睡覺的時(shí)候，我都感覺有人在床下。我要瘋了!”“給我一年時(shí)間，”醫(yī)生說(shuō)，“每周來(lái)三次，我會(huì)治好你。”“費(fèi)用是多少呢?”“每次一百美元。”“我會(huì)認(rèn)真考慮的。”杰瑞答道。
Six months later the doctor met Jerry on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist.
六個(gè)月后醫(yī)生和杰瑞在街上相遇了，“為什么你再也沒來(lái)呢?”醫(yī)生問(wèn)。
For a hundred bucks a visit? The bartender cured me for ." "Is that so! How?" He told me to cut the legs off the bed!" Ain't nobody under there now!!!
“一次一百塊錢嗎?有個(gè)酒吧服務(wù)生收了十塊錢就把我治好了。”“真的?他怎么做到的?”“他讓我把床腿鋸掉。現(xiàn)在那沒人了!”
幽默英文小笑話篇三
Space mountain太空山
Our seven - year - old daughter was thrilled when we took her to disney world for the first time and headed straight for space mountain
我們第一次帶我們七歲的女兒去迪斯尼樂園并直接去太空山時(shí)，她十分激動(dòng)。
I worried that the roller coaster would be too scary for her , but she insisted
我擔(dān)心過(guò)山車對(duì)她來(lái)說(shuō)太刺激，她卻堅(jiān)持要玩。
To her delight, we rode it twice.
使她高興的是，我們玩了兩次。
The next year we returned to the Magic Kingdom and my daughter, now eight, again dragged me to Space Mountain.
第二年我們帶著八歲的她重返神奇王國(guó)時(shí)，她又拉我們?nèi)ヌ丈健?/p>
然而這次，當(dāng)我們站在線外時(shí)，我看到她很冷靜認(rèn)真地看完關(guān)于過(guò)山車速度的游客警告標(biāo)志牌，說(shuō)：“爸爸，我不想玩這個(gè)了”。我問(wèn)她為什么去年敢玩，今年反而害怕了，她說(shuō)：“今年，我識(shí)字了。”
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