英語幽默笑話英漢簡(jiǎn)單短小
英語幽默笑話英漢簡(jiǎn)單短小
根據(jù)百度百科介紹,冷笑話一般指笑話本身因?yàn)闊o聊、諧音字、翻譯、或省去主語、不同邏輯、斷語或特殊內(nèi)容等問題。下面小編整理了英語幽默笑話英漢簡(jiǎn)單短小，希望大家喜歡!
英語幽默笑話英漢簡(jiǎn)單短小品析
日復(fù)一日 Day After Day
A teacher was always so involved in the text being studied that he never looked up. He wouldcall on a student for translation and explanation, and-without realizing it-he often chose thesame student day after day. Out of respect, the student wouldn't point this out to him.
After being called on four days in a row, a student named Goldberg asked advice from hisfriends. The next day when the teacher said "Goldberg, translate and explain," Goldberg replied, "Goldberg is absent today ."
"All right," said the teacher. "You translate and explain."
一位老師對(duì)所講課文總是非常投入，從不抬頭。他常讓一個(gè)學(xué)生來翻譯和解釋，并且不自覺地，他常日復(fù)一日地叫同一個(gè)學(xué)生。出于尊敬，學(xué)生并不給他指出這一點(diǎn)。
一個(gè)叫古德伯格的學(xué)生，在被一連叫了四天之后，向他的朋友尋求建議。第二天，這位教師又說：“古德伯格，翻譯并解釋。”古德伯格回答說：“古德伯格今天缺席。”
“那好吧，”教師說，“那就你來翻譯并解釋。”
經(jīng)典英語幽默笑話英漢簡(jiǎn)單短小
飛鴿傳書
My husband asked me to go to the post office to mail his resume in anticipation of a jobinterview. He instructed me to send it the fastest way possible.
Struck by the urgency in his voice, I grabbed a handful of change and dashed out the door.Arriving at the post office, I rushed to the counter and breathlessly explained to the clerk thatmy envelope had to be delivered immediately . He casually weighed the envelope and said itwould cost $ 10.03.I fumbled through my pockets and tallied up my coins. "But I don't have $ 10. 03, " I said. He punched some more buttons and said, "Okay, that will be $ 7. 40, ma am.
Once more I said in dismay, "Sorry, I don't have $ 7.40.
"Well," he sighed, "exactly how much do you have?"
I meekly answered, "I have exactly $ 2. 15, sir."
With that, he yelled over his shoulder to a coworker, "Hey, Charlie, get the pigeon ready.
郵政快遞
我丈夫讓我到郵局寄他的履歷，期望能得到工作面試的機(jī)會(huì)。他告訴我要用盡可能快的方式把它寄出去。
我感到他語氣緊急，就抓了一把零錢，沖出了家門。到了郵局，我沖到柜臺(tái)，上氣不接下氣地向職員解釋說我的信必須馬上寄出。他漫不經(jīng)心地稱了一下信的重量，說郵費(fèi)是十元零三分。我翻遍了我的口袋，把所有的硬幣都算上。“可是我沒有十元零三分，”我說。他又敲了幾個(gè)鍵，然后說：“那好吧，七元四角，夫人。”
我又一次茫然地說：“對(duì)不起，我沒有七塊四。”
“那，”他嘆了口氣，“確切地說你有多少?”
我很謙和地回答道：“我有整整兩塊一角五分，先生。”
聽了這話，他轉(zhuǎn)過頭向身后的同事喊道：“嗨，查理，準(zhǔn)備好鴿子。”
關(guān)于英語幽默笑話英漢簡(jiǎn)單短小
晚飯準(zhǔn)備好了的信號(hào)
y cooking has always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as I prepared dinner a bittoo quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both ofmy children had received fire-safety training at school, they did not respond to the alarm.Annoyed, I stormed through the house in search of them.
I found them in the bathroom, washing their hands. Over the loud buzzing of the smokealarm, I asked them to identify the sound.
"It's the smoke detector," they replied in unison.
"Do you know what that sound means?" I demanded.
"Sure," my oldest replied. "Dinner's ready."
我的燒飯手藝向來是家庭笑話的攻擊目標(biāo)。一天晚上，晚餐我準(zhǔn)備得有點(diǎn)兒太快了，廚房里充滿了煙，結(jié)果煙霧探查器報(bào)起警來。盡管我的兩個(gè)孩子都在學(xué)校里接受過防火安全訓(xùn)練，可是他們并沒有對(duì)報(bào)警聲作出反應(yīng)。我感到很惱火，滿幢房子亂沖尋找他們。
我在洗漱間找到他們，發(fā)現(xiàn)他們正在洗手。我的聲音蓋過了煙霧警報(bào)的嗡嗡聲，我叫他們辨別那聲音。
“是煙霧探查器，”他們異口同聲地說。
“你們知道那聲音意味著什么嗎?”我責(zé)問道。
“當(dāng)然，”我的大孩子回答道，“晚飯準(zhǔn)備好了。”
英語幽默笑話英漢簡(jiǎn)單短小品味
在空中 In The Air
att and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. Oneday a fair came to the nearby town.
"Let's go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven't been anywhere for a long time."
Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. Atlast he said, "All right, but I'm not going to spend much money. We'll look at things, but wewon't buy anything. "
They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt'swife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.
Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.
"Fun flights!" the notice said, " $ 10 for 10 minutes.
Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn'twant to have to pay for his wife, as well.
"I've only got $ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilotwasn't selling many tickets, so he said, "I'll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn'tscream or shout, she can have a free flight."
Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.
The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flyingupside down.
When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn't make a sound. She can haveher ride free."
"Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn't easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."
麥特和妻子住在鄉(xiāng)下。麥特很吝嗇，討厭花錢。一天附近的鎮(zhèn)子逢集。
“我們?nèi)ペs集，麥特，”妻子說。“我們很久沒出去了。”
麥特想了一會(huì)兒。他知道在集市上一定得花錢。最后他說：“好吧，但我不打算花太多錢。我們只看不買。”
他們?nèi)ゼ校纯此锌少I的東西。有很多東西麥特的妻子想買，但麥特不讓她買。
然后在附近的露天場(chǎng)地，他們看到一架小飛機(jī)。
“有趣的飛行。”海報(bào)上寫著，“10分鐘10美元。”
麥特從來沒有乘過飛機(jī)，所以他想乘一次小飛機(jī)。然而他不想付他妻子的票錢。
“我只帶了10美元，”他對(duì)飛機(jī)駕駛員說，“我妻子能免費(fèi)和我一起乘飛機(jī)嗎?”駕駛員沒賣出多少票，所以他說：“我和你做個(gè)交易。如果你妻子不尖叫，也不叫出聲來，她就能免費(fèi)飛行。”
麥特同意了，他和妻子一起登上了飛機(jī)。
飛機(jī)起飛了，駕駛員讓飛機(jī)做出各種各樣的動(dòng)作。有一會(huì)兒飛機(jī)倒著飛行。
飛機(jī)著陸時(shí)，駕駛員說，“好吧，你妻子沒發(fā)出任何聲響。她就不用買飛機(jī)票了。”
“謝謝，”麥特說，“你知道，這對(duì)她不容易，特別當(dāng)她剛才掉下去的時(shí)候。”