關(guān)于幽默英語(yǔ)短篇文章
關(guān)于幽默英語(yǔ)短篇文章
隨著經(jīng)濟(jì)活動(dòng)的全球化，英語(yǔ)日益成為國(guó)際交往的重要工具，英語(yǔ)教育的低齡化使幼兒園英語(yǔ)教育逐漸成為教育界的一個(gè)熱點(diǎn)話題。本文是關(guān)于幽默英語(yǔ)短篇文章，希望對(duì)大家有幫助!
關(guān)于幽默英語(yǔ)短篇文章：A Fall Into the Pit,Not Gain In the Wit (吃一塹，不長(zhǎng)一智)
A policeman escorted(押送，護(hù)送) a habitual criminal passing by a mountain village. Seeing contain sundries store at village end, the recidivist(慣犯) put forward to buy a of pack cigarette. The policeman pondered (長(zhǎng)時(shí)間考慮，深思)over:You seized the chance to escape last time like so. Hum, Cut it out(少來(lái)這一套). Therefore he said to the prisoner:" You wait here, I go to buy." While coming back, he found the repeater(慣犯) missing still.
一個(gè)警察押著一個(gè)慣犯來(lái)到一個(gè)小山村。見(jiàn)村頭有家雜貨店，犯人提出要進(jìn)去買(mǎi)包香煙。警察想：你上次就是這樣借機(jī)逃跑的，哼，少來(lái)這一套。于是，他對(duì)犯人說(shuō)：“你在這等著，我進(jìn)去買(mǎi)。”回來(lái)時(shí)，犯人還是不見(jiàn)了。
關(guān)于幽默英語(yǔ)短篇文章：Boss's idea 老板的主意
When my printer's type began to go faint, I called a repair shop where a friendly man told me that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned.
由于我的打印機(jī)不能打印出清晰的字來(lái)，我就打電話給維修部。電話是一位非常和藹的男人接的，他說(shuō)我的打印機(jī)也許只是需要清理一下。
Because the shop charged 50 pounds for such cleanings, he told me, it would be better for me to read the printer's directions and try the job myself.
他還說(shuō)，如果讓維修部清理的話要交50英鎊的清理費(fèi)，讓我最好看看使用手冊(cè)自己試著清理。
Pleasantly surprised by his words, I asked, "Does your boss know that you discouragebusiness?"
當(dāng)時(shí)我真的被他的話感動(dòng)了，就問(wèn)他：“你們老板知道你這樣拒絕生意么?”
"Actually it's my boss's idea," the employee replied. "We usually make more money on repairs if we let people try to repair things themselves first."
“事實(shí)上，這就是我們老板的主意，”雇員答道：“因?yàn)槿绻覀冏層脩?hù)先自行修理打印機(jī)的話就能掙更多的錢(qián)。”
關(guān)于幽默英語(yǔ)短篇文章：迪斯尼之旅
On a trip to Disney World in Florida, my husband and I adn our two children devotedourselves wholeheartedly to the wonders of this attraction. After three exhausting days, we headed for home.
弗羅里達(dá)州的迪斯尼樂(lè)園是一個(gè)迷人的地方。一次我和丈夫以及兩個(gè)孩子前往旅游，我們?nèi)硇牡爻磷碓谒母鞣N奇觀之中。精疲力竭地玩了三天之后，我們要回家了。
As we drove away, our son waved and said, "Good-by, Mickey."
當(dāng)我們驅(qū)車(chē)離開(kāi)時(shí)，兒子揮手說(shuō)："再見(jiàn)，美奇。"
Our daughter waved and said, "Good-by, Minnie."
女兒揮著手說(shuō)，"再見(jiàn)，美妮。"
My husband waved, rather weakly, and said, "Good-by, Money."
丈夫也有氣無(wú)力地?fù)]了揮手，說(shuō)道："再見(jiàn)，美元。"
關(guān)于幽默英語(yǔ)短篇文章：A blind date 相親
After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date.
和相親對(duì)象呆了一晚上后，男人再也受不了了。
Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave.
他事先安排了個(gè)朋友給他打電話，這樣他就能借故先離開(kāi)了。
When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died."
當(dāng)他回到桌邊，他垂下眼睛，裝出一副陰沉的表情，說(shuō)：“有個(gè)不幸的消息，我的祖父剛剛?cè)ナ懒恕?rdquo;
"Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"
“謝天謝地!”他的約會(huì)對(duì)象說(shuō)，“如果你的祖父不死，我的祖父就得死了!”
關(guān)于幽默英語(yǔ)短篇文章：The Same Action Yields the Same Result
A couple of hunters chartered a small plane to fly them to a forest,and made an appointment with the pilot to come back and fetch them in about two weeks. At the end of the two weeks, they had shot a lot of animals that they wanted to load onto the plane. But the pilot said, "This plane won't be able to take more than one wild buffalo. You'll have to leave the others behind."
Then the hunters protested, saying, "But last year, another pilot with the same airplane let us take two buffalos and some other animals in the plane as well."So the new pilot thought about it. He was a little bit skeptical, but finally he said, "OK, since you did it last year, I guess this year we can do it again." Then he loaded the two buffalos and a few other animals in, and the plane took off. Five minutes later, it crashed in a neighboring area.The three men climbed out and looked around, and one hunter said to the other, "Where do you think we are now?" The second one surveyed the area and said, "I think we're about one mile to the left of the place we crashed last year."
同樣的行為，同樣的結(jié)果
有兩個(gè)獵人包機(jī)前往一座森林，到了以后，他們和飛行員約定好兩周后來(lái)接。兩周后，他們射了許多動(dòng)物，而且打算把這些動(dòng)物全部搬上那架小飛機(jī)，可是飛行員說(shuō)：「這架飛機(jī)除了一頭野牛外，沒(méi)辦法再多載了。
你們必須把其他的獵物都留下?！公C人說(shuō)：「但是去年另一個(gè)飛行員開(kāi)一樣的飛機(jī)，就讓我們帶兩只水牛，還有一些其他的動(dòng)物上機(jī)!」因?yàn)樗麄冞@樣抗議，所以那個(gè)新飛行員想了一想后，盡管還是有點(diǎn)存疑，最后還是妥協(xié)說(shuō)：「好吧!如果去年可以做到，今年應(yīng)該也可以。」所以他裝了兩頭水牛和一些其他的動(dòng)物。結(jié)果飛機(jī)起飛五分鐘后，就墜落在鄰近的地方。這3個(gè)人從飛機(jī)爬出來(lái)看了看四周，其中一個(gè)獵人對(duì)另一個(gè)說(shuō)：「你認(rèn)為我們現(xiàn)在在哪兒?」那個(gè)人瞧了一下，說(shuō)：「我想大概距離去年墜機(jī)的地方西邊一英哩遠(yuǎn)!」
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